May 10, 2018 21:30
Within La Francia in Scena, artistic season of Institut français Italy, realized on the iniziative of the French Embassy in Italia, with the support of Institut français and Ministère de la Culture et de la Communication
In my dream, I was alone, in a very large space, facing one particular person: my father.
At that moment, I confessed.
My father died seven years ago, without prior notice, alone, in the morning. He left us all of a sudden. No time to bid him farewell… And yet, I still would have liked to tell him so many things, I would have liked to tell him about my life, far away from him, confessing secrets and dancing in front of him… Now he is gone, and will never return.
To my father, I wished to tell him all that I could have never been able to say to him, what I had never taken time to tell and what I had never dared tell him. Fear, and our own culture, the way in which we used to live together had always hindered this need to say things, and when I felt the need to do it, I had a lack of courage and strength, maybe even conviction, because, in the end, what was the point of it all?
Today, I know that speaking to him, who is absent and far from me, as if I were confessing myself, telling him all my tenderness, revealing to him how burdensome and bitter the secret and the silence were, and revealing to him, how much dancing has allowed me to exorcize myself.
I will write my confessions with gestures, like words, and with movements, like sentences. I will tell him my life story. I will also express, through dancing, the hesitation of a sentence that begins, and that is resumed elsewhere, that does not know where to begin with, like the Variations that brush the theme though the pianist’s fingers and give a variety of approaches. Stronger, softer, different, piano, pianissimo.
Radhouane El Meddeb